This is a new feature!! Ohh it’s like we have a snazzy magazine, but totally different! Because it’s a blog …in case you were wondering. Every Sunday Captain Pants and I do something fun aka live life. We try to go places neither of us have been, do an interesting activity, take a class on something random, etc. All in an effort to increase our excelling at life factor!
Last week I wrote about us driving down PCH and hitting a fun restaurant for Mojitos. This week we went to The Getty Villa . Pants discovered you have to get tickets before you can go to The Villa that issue you a certain time to show up. Best thing about these tickets is that they are free. Pants and I took care of our grown up-stuff and other responsibilities, got ready, grabbed jackets and jumped in the car. Instead of our usual PCH mix we threw on the Twilight soundtrack. We feel like 13 year old fan girls lately, hence the need to culture ourselves at a museum. Remind ourselves we are grown ass people! I digress … the sky was beautiful, we took Las Virgenes down to PCH since that way is always prettier than Kanan. We chatted about life, love and the fact Pants had a huge blonde moment wondering who this “Anon” person was that wrote all these amazing quotes she found on the internet. Don’t worry … she figured it out herself before I had to wonder where I put her helmet and restrain her from licking the windows. Right when we got to PCH we gasped at how pretty and clear the view was that day. Sundays are made for shit like this!
We spent the next 30 minuets trying to get into the Getty Villa. It is actually in Pacific Palisades which makes them liars since they claim it’s in Malibu, you can only approach from the south in order to get in and the entrance isn’t exactly visible or well marked. But after several illegal U Turns we were there. We were past our scheduled “entrance time” and worried the guard would not let us in. We drive up and hand the Guard our tickets that we had printed from the Internet. We were 42 minutes late. He looks at the tickets, looks at us and I just say “We got really lost” as I nod over at the blonde. He could tell she was seconds away from licking the window and said “your fine… head up and stay to the right!” Apparently he thought I would miss all 6 signs that said stay right on the 200ft drive to the parking structure.
We park, turn off our phones …although we didn’t need to, there is no reception at the Getty Villa, grab a map and head inside. We start wondering around trying to get in. It’s a little confusing at first and even though we have a map, we are never ones for following directions. We cross over a little bridge thing … to the right is a great view of the ocean to the left is what looks like a pool at a roman bath house. We walk the length of the pool commenting on how creepy the statues are since they decided to put what appears to be plastic eye balls in them. We can’t decide which is creepier … statues with plastic eye balls or statues with gaping holes for eye balls. After 15 min we decide it’s a toss up. We over hear 25 different Euro conversations and head in to the greek and roman history room on the left. It was interesting to say the least. Lots of back stabbing, a woman so beautiful she was the cause of a great war, affairs, etc. Turns out drama queen maybe the oldest living profession, not prostitution. We keep poking around and find ourselves in a room full of carved statues of men. I must say a flaccid uncircumcised penis must be very difficult to carve …or so it appears. They were all very pointy.
We head into another room that celebrates the mythological god of wine. Pants and I had found our room! He is described as a young attractive man with a crown of grape leaves. Often depicted wearing little and having a grand time being fairly buzzed. He is my new mythological boyfriend. Also in this room was coffin art. Turns out both Pants and I are morbid and really enjoyed the detail they put into coffins and the fact the scenes usually depicted happy times or something of significance. We both noted how short the coffins were. We may have not evolved in the drama factor as a species but at least we evolved in height.
Several more statues later we come across a bust of Alexander the Great. Next to him they have the bust of his ”BFF”, Hephaestion. I had forgotten Alexander the great was for the gays. He actually had many male lovers throughout his life, as well as 3 wives. This story is right along the lines of “…and so go the days of our lives!”. The Getty seemed to tip toe around the issue and just claimed the guy to be his dearest and closest friend that he felt passionately about. Pants and I started commenting on how we hadn’t seen the movie with Colin Farrel and that we should watch it because..well it’s Colin Farrel and he is hot! And we apparently sometimes have the libos of 16 year old boys, looking at linoleum makes us horny. Isn’t it funny how if you are not getting any on the regular … it suddenly becomes the thought that constantly pops up in your twisted little mind? Or maybe it’s that we can turn anything into a sexual innuendo.
There was a really cool exhibit by some poet dude with writings painted on the wall, an awesome section on jewelry throughout the eras, a full mummy with the person still inside and much more.
We closed the place down, grabbed a cup of coffee, walked through the awesome herb garden and headed to the car. On our way back down PCH it started raining a tad for about 10 minutes. It made the sunset even better …especially with my coffee, ipod mix going and Captain Pants riding shot gun. All in All … to quote Ice Cube, Today was a Good Day.
Hey! I have a present for you! Because we have all dated this guy at some point!!
JT is the creepiest Janitor ever!