… The Act of Being Whoremotional

He’s Just not that into You .. or Me … February 16, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — Miss Communication @ 8:20 pm
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I had a pretty kick ass week and weekend! I had an awesome work week .. fun shoots with some added comedy. The make-up room is the equivalent of a girls locker room and you learn OH SO much information. Not always things you want to learn .. but oh well. Mr. Sunshine and I played a fun game on set .. the wagers .. bites of pastries. Blame him if I get fat.

I went to drinks/dinner with some friends during the week. The gathering of people was a fun bunch! On Thursday I went to an industry event and caught up with some friends … Friday I went to a drinks things with some friends then headed to another friends birthday party which was 90% fun, 10% awkward. Part of the awkwardness was a guy I am kinda digging was there as well as someone I used to “hang out” with. The bar was REALLY small. Fun times! Super glad Pants was my date!

Saturday Captain Pants and I headed to a kick ass travel convention and then went to see “He’s just not that into you!” P.S. Travel is super cheap right now … BOOK yourself for the future =) Pants and I are deciding trips based on my ability to eat my way through a country. Japan, Thailand, Italy, France … yum! I digress .. I have a point to this post that does not involve alcohol or food .. actually it kinda does.

So I had read the book “he’s just not that into you!” which was pretty decent and funny .. also a lot of harsh truths. Pants is currently reading it. I was interested to see it turned into a story. Seeing the movie reminded me how true certain aspects of the book are.

So here are some of my comments on select quotes from the movie:

“::little girl gets pushed and ridiculed by little boy:: Do you know why that little boy did those things? Because he likes you….
We are all programmed to believe that if a guy acts like a total jerk that means he likes you.”

I was in the second grade when a teacher at school told me that. There was a boy who constantly teased me. Not only that … he was the one to inform me Santa Clause wasn’t real and what the “69” was with an impressive finger puppet demonstration … prick. While that did turn out to be true .. the whole mean to you to get your attention thing is usually out grown by boys around the age of 15. If your still thinking this is a sign of flirting … your wrong. Don’t get me wrong fun verbal sparring and stuff is fine … but it says total jerk. Douchebaggery is not flirting … or cute for that matter.

“An excuse is a polite rejection. Men are not afraid of “ruining the friendship.”
Sadly … this is probably very true. I know we ladies have a hard time with this one … well mostly because we often end up falling for friends. Women usually fall for guys based off their personality and how they treat us. If they are a friend .. they probably treat you very well. Your probably friends with the guy because he has a cool personality. The longer your friends the more qualities you see in the guy that you like … and would like in a boyfriend. Then you start romanticizing the friendship actions. Truth be told … you would probably never get to that level of friendship if he was into you … because HE WOULD have done something about it at some point to let you know different. If he hasn’t … move on.

Note to guys: it’s your job to make it clear that you are friends with someone too. Don’t be all vague and stuff. People get over rejection really well .. they do not get over being lead on for no reason or being used as an ego boost.

“Don’t get tricked into asking him out. If he likes you, he’ll do the asking.”
“Hey, let’s meet at so-and-so’s party/any bar/friend’s house” is not a date.”

So I just had this conversation with two of my boys. I complained guys don’t ask girls out anymore. First it’s a facebook message, then some texting, then let’s meet up at a group thing, blah blah blah. That’s not letting me know if you want to be my friend or if you want to possibly date me. For all I know you could be interested in hiring me or wanting to use me as a reference. Granted I don’t expect someone to know that from meeting me in 10 minutes. But they could know if they want to go to coffee … to get to know me. Just like I know if I would be interested in going to said coffee date to get to know them. One of the guys said we ladies were intimidating … but my response is .. so! We shouldn’t have to do all the work. Guys can generally tell based on body language, eye contact, unnecessary arm touching, etc … if you will get a yes or no to the question of a date. It’s our job to let the guy know that his odds are really good .. it’s their job to ask. Guys this is also good for you .. it keeps you out of the “friends zone” if your really not that interested in being there.

Also, I am sick of the let’s meet up somewhere thing … That maybe OK the first time if you barely know me and are trying to see if you’re interested. But after that … ask me on a real date, like a real man.

“I had this guy leave me a voice mail at work, so I called him at home, and then he emailed me to my BlackBerry, and so I texted to his cell, and now you just have to go around checking all these different portals just to get rejected by seven different technologies. It’s exhausting.”
I loved this line!! It’s true .. as addicted to my crackberry as I am .. and as much as I am the texting queen … I do miss the days of 1 form of contact. Life seemed simpler … like when I walked to school 5 miles in the snow … I kid, nothing is as close as 5 miles in LA!

**** OK so a friend said to me “i’m sorry your so disenchanted by the dating scene” after reading this. I would like to state for the record .. i’m actually not. It has it quirks and annoyances and all .. but on a whole, i love it! I am a hopeless romantic and actually enjoy the whole process. I even enoy internally twisting and turning trying to figure out if a guy likes me .. doesn’t like me .. just wants to go for a roll in the hay, etc! There is a lot of fun in that! I do post a lot of entries that focus on the negative .. but it’s mostly that’s what is most relateable about my life. My good stuff is usually boring and invloves me cuddling on the couch with a movie and some popcorn. Not many sentences to write about that! I do love the good stuff .. more then i like to laugh at the negative ***


2 Responses to “He’s Just not that into You .. or Me …”

  1. rs27 Says:

    Where you at Boulevard 3 on Thursday? WE were next door at Social and We saw those awards there when we passed by.

    My friends snuck in thinking it was our event and hilarity ensued.

  2. I was there!!! thats funny! I am going to need details of the hilarity … it will make my day!

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