Whoremotions

… The Act of Being Whoremotional

Porn Industry Water Cooler Talk February 24, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — Miss Communication @ 8:10 pm
Tags: , ,

So what do people in porn talk about at the office water cooler? First of all we don’t have an office water cooler … we have lots of bottles of water though! People get dehydrated from sex ya know. Mostly it’s a mish mash of randomness, body parts, plastic surgery, things that make you laugh and your real life. Mostly we IM each other in the fab life of adult entertainment. Captain Pants and I IM each other from our separate offices all day long. Crazy I know … we chat all day, are roommates and still kick it on the weekends! I’m surprised we haven’t killed each other either.

I decided I would just paste today’s conversation to give the world some insight into our strange lives. This has not been changed at all. I only starred out names to protect the not so innocent. Enjoy!


Captain Pants(12:50:43 PM): yum…thanks for my cottage cheese
Miss Communication (12:51:12 PM): No worries
Miss Communication (12:56:05 PM): I’m meeting **** for lunch right now
Captain Pants(12:56:48 PM): nice!
Captain Pants(12:57:01 PM): tell him i said hi…and thats not me peeing on you..
Miss Communication (12:57:34 PM): I will for sure
Captain Pants(2:31:40 PM): :::INSERT LINK TO PORN SITE::: there now you can tell **** that that idea has already been done…LOL
Miss Communication (2:34:41 PM): omg .. wonder if thats real
Miss Communication (2:34:47 PM): or male talent just sitting in a wheel chair
Captain Pants(2:36:27 PM): and yeah that male talent in the wheelchair is pretty hot too…
Captain Pants(2:42:02 PM): but next time your boss brings up the whole thing you can tell him it’s been done…lol
Miss Communication (3:26:42 PM): :::Insert link to shemale talent here:::
Miss Communication (3:26:51 PM): totally couldn’t have guessed that was a dude!!!
Captain Pants (3:30:25 PM): its a dude!!!!!
Miss Communication (3:30:32 PM): yes
Captain Pants (3:30:42 PM): where does it say that?!!!
Miss Communication (3:31:09 PM): ::: Insert same link again .. but with bigger full body shot:::
Captain Pants (3:31:32 PM): whoa
Miss Communication (3:31:46 PM): lmao …i know my thoughts exactly
Captain Pants (3:31:53 PM): 1. what is up with her nails
Captain Pants (3:32:01 PM): 2. why are you looking at shemales????
Miss Communication (3:32:43 PM): i was looking for older people for dialog parts .. so i just clicked the “all” button under gender on NAME OF AGENCY … hence the tranny coming up .. i didnt even know NAME OF AGENCY had trannys
Miss Communication (3:34:14 PM): PS that dudes name is ****
Miss Communication (3:34:26 PM): ::insert link to ****’s picture here::
Captain Pants (3:34:59 PM): haha…when they are completely shaved like that and erect…it looks like the put their penis on with putty
Captain Pants (3:35:07 PM): like what doesn’t belong
Captain Pants (3:35:12 PM): it just looks weird
Captain Pants (3:35:13 PM): haha
Captain Pants (3:35:20 PM): makes me giggle everytime
Miss Communication (3:35:25 PM): i agree … it’s like it’s detached
Captain Pants (3:35:33 PM): like a mr. potatohead
Captain Pants (3:35:41 PM): and thats just one of his mustaches
Miss Communication (3:36:13 PM): ohhh for the love of god **** is back .. he is strangely nice and scary all at the same time
Miss Communication (3:37:04 PM): btw the new 18yo who looks 12 is now doing anal
Miss Communication (3:37:06 PM): :::Link to 18 yo models page:::
Captain Pants (3:37:24 PM): that means nothing to me
Miss Communication (3:37:51 PM): she is still new
Captain Pants (3:37:53 PM): looks like we may have not shot her though
Miss Communication (3:37:57 PM): they probably haven’t shot her
Captain Pants (3:38:06 PM): I have seen her before
Miss Communication (3:38:08 PM): ohhh i lie then and serve no purpose …
Captain Pants (3:38:30 PM): lol…you serve lots of purpose
Captain Pants (3:38:44 PM): but im sure **** will say we have shot her..I feel like we have shot her
Captain Pants (3:38:47 PM): forget her
Miss Communication (3:38:59 PM): BTW … have you noticed that every single email from LARGE AGENCY is a blonde girl with an awful set of bolt ons
Captain Pants (3:39:01 PM): ALWAYS
Captain Pants (3:39:13 PM): but i do need asains…and not porno looking asians…lol
Miss Communication (3:39:43 PM): i almost replied today with .. really?? do you have to get all of them a bad boob job before i even get a chance to shoot them?
Captain Pants (3:40:00 PM): yes…he must
Miss Communication (3:40:11 PM): i think he has a plastic fetish
Captain Pants (3:40:33 PM): ps…i really dont want to work today..lol
Miss Communication (3:40:34 PM): or shiny taunt skin fetish .. kinda like his head
Miss Communication (3:43:54 PM): :::LINK TO NEW MODELS PAGE:::
Miss Communication (3:43:56 PM): she’s new
Miss Communication (3:43:59 PM): and pretty
Miss Communication (3:44:13 PM): nice boobs
Captain Pants (3:44:14 PM): she is
Miss Communication (3:44:23 PM): but i feel as if you have shot her
Miss Communication (3:44:53 PM): yep you have
Miss Communication (3:44:56 PM): i goggled her
Captain Pants (3:45:18 PM): really?
Miss Communication (3:45:21 PM): :::LINK PROVING PANTS COMPANY HAS SHOT HER:::
Captain Pants (3:46:02 PM): lol
Miss Communication (3:46:06 PM): does it matter that she looks better now??
Miss Communication (3:54:04 PM): :::LINK TO A GIRL THAT HATES MISS COMMUNICATION:::
Miss Communication (3:54:11 PM): she hates me … lol
Miss Communication (4:00:24 PM): :::LINK TO PHOTO GALLERY OF GIRL WITH REALLY BAD LIP INJECTIONS::: thats blow up lips name ..
Miss Communication (4:00:28 PM): i didnt even know her name
Captain Pants (4:14:00 PM): yeah I thought i told you ******* name..lol
Captain Pants (4:14:06 PM): blow up lips…lol
Captain Pants (4:15:10 PM): ps on that join site..pretty sure thats johnny **** penis…lol
Captain Pants (4:15:26 PM): or maybe Jordan ****
Captain Pants (4:15:35 PM): they both have that veiny thing going
Miss Communication (4:15:40 PM): thats sad that we can do that … i wish they had some type of porn Jeopardy for that .. we would be rich!
Captain Pants (4:16:28 PM): yeah we would
Miss Communication (4:17:31 PM): maybe we pitch that idea to a tv exec .. then go on .. win the money and move to paris
Captain Pants (4:17:42 PM): NICE!!
Captain Pants (4:17:50 PM): i like your thinking
Captain Pants (4:18:16 PM): hey…how did you win all your money…well you see we won the name that dirty dick game show!!!!
Miss Communication (4:18:27 PM): why do i think that if brazzers or Reality Kings saw this im convo right now .. they would make some sort of gonzo site based on the idea
Captain Pants (4:18:39 PM): hahahaha im sure!
Miss Communication (4:19:07 PM): imagine if they had a name that dirty vagina game show!! eww .. this convo just got gross
Captain Pants (4:19:16 PM): ewwww time out
Miss Communication (4:19:24 PM): oddly i deem it only got gross after the idea of dirty vagina
Captain Pants (4:19:36 PM): haha
Miss Communication (4:19:52 PM): btw .. facebook is boring today
Miss Communication (4:20:04 PM): but .. fmylife.com .. always entertaining
Captain Pants (4:20:17 PM): haha…you should put stuff on there
Miss Communication (4:20:36 PM): are you saying my life sucks?
Captain Pants (4:20:49 PM): noooo…lol
Miss Communication (4:20:52 PM): liar
Captain Pants (4:21:06 PM): haha..you just have some fml moments
Miss Communication (4:21:37 PM): i guess .. i should post there
Miss Communication (4:21:57 PM): did i tell you ******* called me today … he is the hardest person to get off the phone with
Miss Communication (4:22:09 PM): i saved you .. i told him email worked better for you
Miss Communication (4:22:24 PM): and for me too .. but the ME thing went over his head
Captain Pants (4:23:09 PM): haha..I ignored his call yesterday..
Miss Communication (4:26:03 PM): i ignore them almost every 2 days .. he told me i was hard to get a hold of .. i again explained i answered emails with the quickness
Miss Communication (4:26:13 PM): wanna know what sucks about working with all older people?
Miss Communication (4:26:35 PM): outside of them not getting my jokes … which has affected my humor confidence level
Captain Pants (4:26:36 PM): what/ nap time?
Captain Pants (4:26:53 PM): handicap accessible bathrooms
Miss Communication (4:26:53 PM): i wish … no one does the 3pm-ish red bull/candy run
Captain Pants (4:27:04 PM): hand rails
Captain Pants (4:27:10 PM): herbal tea
Captain Pants (4:27:19 PM): depends rather than tampons in the bathroom
Miss Communication (4:27:28 PM): we don’t have handicap stuff .. they just want to make handicap porn .. get it right
Miss Communication (4:27:58 PM): but seriously .. i don’t have anyone that well eventually break down and go get me stuff from the liquor store
Miss Communication (4:28:09 PM): i need a red bull
Miss Communication (4:28:16 PM): i dont want to go get it myself
Miss Communication (4:28:24 PM): that requires effort …
Captain Pants (4:28:30 PM): no **** there for you
Captain Pants (4:28:32 PM): or me
Miss Communication (4:29:09 PM): lol no **** .. and you stopped that awhile ago .. unless you were dead ass tired before 3 .. we had others to do that
Miss Communication (4:29:30 PM): ohhhh wanna hear something funny .. so ***** is having a hard time naming his baby
Miss Communication (4:29:38 PM): all names remind him of porn stars
Miss Communication (4:29:44 PM): i know that will happen to me
Captain Pants (4:29:59 PM): hahha
Captain Pants (4:30:03 PM): that sucks!!
Miss Communication (4:30:20 PM): it happened to me when I was naming MY DOGS NAME HERE … not that i think naming a baby and a dog are similar
Miss Communication (4:30:29 PM): but my dog is the equivalent of my baby
Captain Pants (4:31:01 PM): hahaha
Miss Communication (4:31:38 PM): i still have no idea what im cooking for set tomorrow
Miss Communication (4:31:50 PM): there is no fridge or microwave there
Miss Communication (4:32:13 PM): ohhh and im carpolling with ****
Miss Communication (4:32:31 PM): which should be awesome …. i love talking about his girlfriend lol
Captain Pants (4:32:51 PM): hahaha
Miss Communication (4:35:54 PM): i wish i was at home right now
Miss Communication (4:36:36 PM): am i bad employee if i come in at 10am .. take an hour and a half lunch and leave now?
Captain Pants (4:39:24 PM): nooooooo
Miss Communication (4:40:05 PM): are you lying again
Miss Communication (4:40:17 PM): we have to do something about your compulsive need to lie
Captain Pants (4:45:37 PM): i just say what people like to hear

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6 Responses to “Porn Industry Water Cooler Talk”

  1. steph anne Says:

    haha i enjoyed reading this! thanks for the laugh. and i agree… fmylife is more entertaining than facebook!

  2. Hahahaha I love this! Oh and I heart Fmylife too! that shit is grand!
    BTW totally random but I had lunch with a girlfriend of mine last weekend who reads my blog and we got to talking about blogs and things. Anyways she goes “OMG who are the whoremotions girls? I LOVE them, seriously I read it everyday!” So of course I had to let her know that I have known miss communication for freakin ever and how damn fab you are 🙂

  3. Captain Pants Says:

    OMG!!!! I loved this post..though I was a part of it, it was sooooo funny to step back and read it again. Is there something wrong with our daily conversation?! HAHA. FYI I am too suprised we have not killed each other yet! HAHA

  4. floreta Says:

    WOW! you have quite the interesting life!! consider me a new reader.. 🙂

  5. Good website…mylifeiscrap.com actually was the unofficial english version until, FML was lunched a couple of month later. Viedemerde.fr is the original website…

  6. jennytruant Says:

    I love reading this and realizing how bizarre life in porn really is…


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