Whoremotions

… The Act of Being Whoremotional

Adventures in Internet Dating: Thank You Captain Obvious March 23, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — Captain Pants @ 5:40 pm
Tags: , , ,

Time to share some more emails with you. These ones are my collection of “Thank You Captain Obvious” emails. I wonder if any of these lines have ever worked for these guys. Obviously not, haha. Well, they still aren’t working! I have also been on a few dates. Blogs and updates on all that coming soon =)

Freaking adorable!
-Duh!

I’m doing well, thank you! So, I have to say that I never really know how to interpret when people give me short replies; I don’t know if you aren’t interested and are just replying because it’s appropriate, or because you’re genuinely interested in talking. So, please do let me know if you are, because you seem really nice and I’d love to get you know you more. But if not, no hard feelings, just don’t want to waste each other’s time! 🙂
-Uhhh…Ok

Hey sorry to bother you but I just had to say I think you’re so fucking sexy!
-Again, Duh! haha

You get wayyy to much attention on here. Lots of goofballs who wouldn’t have the balls to approach you in a million years in real life suddenly have the courage to hit on you online 😉 Dumasses.. clogging up the lines for the rest of us that actually make great things happen for deserving, fun women… read my profile. I’ll quiz you on it when we meet for coffee 🙂
-No duh guys have the courage to hit on pretty girls now. That’s why we are all on this whole Internet thing, but kinda funny.

Hey want to grab a drink sometime? I know that sounds pretty bold but I’m not sure how this online thing works but I do know hanging out with someone in person is the best way to get to know them. So write me back if you want to hang out sometime.
-Thank you Captain Obvious and no, but thanks! Also, this guy is a repeat offender. I have got this message from him many times and many other emails, but I have never responded. Wonder when he’ll get the hint.

Sorry for the brief profile, but I wasn’t planning on being on the site long. Anyway, here’s a little more about me…
-And you won’t be on it for much longer if you don’t take the time to fill it out. I took the time! And time is money for me. Note to you: I do NOT write back to those who were obviously too lazy to fill out their profile.

How are you? I winked at you on another site and never got a response, so I should probably take the hint… I noticed you looked at my profile on here, though, so I figured why not send you a message. Anyway, I hope all is well and I wish you the best of luck. I’d love to hear from you…
-You got it! Thank you Captain Obvious.

i dont have very much luck on this thing…im not sure why….maybe its just the bad pictures…anyway…so im not really expecting anything back from you…but i thought i would tell you that i think you are gorgeous…and if you ever want to get together for coffee or drinks or anything with a sweet smart honest hard working guy who knows how a lady is supposed to be treated then let me know
-Wow! You really talked yourself up didn’t you. Hope you didn’t go and cut your wrists after that email attempt.

How have you been? We chatted a few times on here and AIM a while back, you probably don’t remember. It seems like you keep your IM off nowadays. Anyway I thought we could chat again, send me a message if you get a chance.
-FYI: You are the reason I keep my IM off

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One Response to “Adventures in Internet Dating: Thank You Captain Obvious”

  1. Oh gawd I have SO been here! Same lame ass responses! I actually agreed to meet this one guy – even though he was like 40 and then I googled his “match” screenname and he was on dontdatehimgirl.com! He seemed like the normal one too…

    Ugh I fail at online dating, that is for sure!


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